That's Mr. Luthor To You!

Coke and hookers really do go together like peanut butter and jelly.

Aquaman just dropped by the Pacific divison of Lexcorp and pwnzored my koi pond.

And stole his precious trident back from me.

I was really looking forward to ruling the seven seas for a little while. What a jerk.

Accidental Villain You scored 77% villainy!

Examples of accidental villains: Parasite Shriek The Riddler You never would have chosen the path of evil, but now that you're on it, you've found you like it. You were perhaps exceedingly, painfully average before; and really, you're no different now. The difference is, really, that somebody pushed you too far, and now everybody else gets to pay for it. You revel in your newfound unique powers or identity; you like the attention that you get by being on the 'bad' side, and don't really care for either one. You're looking out for number one, because hey, nobody else is going to.

My test tracked 1 variable How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 98% on villainy

Link: The DC Animated Universe Test written by gypsykai on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the 32-Type Dating Test

ACCIDENTAL VILLAIN?!? Oh yes, I accidentally became a billionaire industrialist with a penchant for illegal cloning experiments, and little green rocks that kill aliens. How can I be "exceedingly, painfully average" when I was the goddamn President of the United States (and if any of my liberal friends make a W joke here, I will destroy you). To be compared to Parasite is completely insulting. Parasite is C-list baby. That purple loser has the ability to steal Superman's powers, and he is still robbing liquor stores? COME ON! And that hack the Riddler doesn't even make sense in this quiz. He accidentally became a thief who left clues at the crime scene? This test is B.S.

I'm going to track down this "gypsykai" who wrote the test, and inject her with a serum I've developed that causes cystic fibrosis.

Kenneth Lay, whose name has become synonymous with corporate abuse and accounting fraud died last night. Lexcorp and the Luthor family wish to personally extend their deepest regrets to this great loss to the business community.

Furthermore anybody who claims that we had anything to do with the titanium Lay-bot with the kryptonite heart that attacked Superman earlier this afternoon will promptly hear from my lawyers.

Usually when I am in a mood this foul, I would have the patience to wait until my three o'clock judo class to take out my aggression. It is an incredible outlet for my anger. At the end of almost every lesson, one of my sparring partners gets cocky, or vociferous and I get to snap his neck with a well timed shoulder throw. I keep the sensi quiet with a hefty retainer, and in turn he keeps me in supply of vagrant purple belts. At this point I would imagine that his dojo is almost completely comprised of homeless men receiving the cheapest soup, and the most expensive martial arts training money can buy.

But that is still hours away. Besides one of Lexcorp's research centers just spent a lot of my money trying to prove the cathartic nature of blogging, so I figured perhaps I could prove a useful labrat.

See the thing is I hate Superman, like whoa! That alien is such a tool, and my tolerance for his antics has begun to wear thin. I found those crystals fair and square. You can't say you own a cave in the middle of the arctic, and everything inside of it. Maybe I should get my real estate lawyer to track down a copy of the deed to this "fortress of solitude." I'd really like to see which business savvy eskimo sold his thousand acre snow lot to the kryptonian.

I had this really great scheme to make more land. It would have been totally sweet! Superman picked up the entire thing, and just tossed it into space. I think I am going to have something built that can do that to his stupid fortress.

In the meantime, I am going to invite the chief scientist in the "cathartic blogging" research center and invite him to spar me in judo.